I’ve been that little girl before, sans the lime swim cap and pink plaid suit. My thighs have never been quite that dainty either, if we want to get technical. But I have stood on the edge of a diving board and wondered if I was brave enough to jump. Literally.
I was in junior high P.E. class and we were exploring everything from badminton to soccer. Somewhere in the middle of the semester I found myself required to dive off a diving board, except I couldn’t do it. I was too terrified. It wasn’t even the high dive, it was the low dive…if that’s what it’s called. Sporting the navy P.E. issue swimsuit I stood with my toes curled around edge of the board while the entire class waited for me to dive. I couldn’t. The water below was just too far away and getting to it required me to enter head first. Finally my kind-hearted teacher said I could come down off the diving board, sit on the side of the pool and watch.
I still can’t dive. I could barely watch Olympic diving this summer without sweaty palms.
Sometimes I feel like the queen of fear. There are so many things I’m afraid of. Ironically one of the things I’m most afraid of is performing. Can you imagine! I’m a singer/songwriter! Performing is what we do! Standing center stage with a microphone in front of my mouth, frightens me in an almost paralyzing way. But when we let our faith be bigger than our fear, we can overcome.
This Fall I did my first ever concert tour and it was an amazing experience. When I agreed to do the tour, one side of my brain was saying, “What a great opportunity,” and the other side was screaming, “Are you INSANE!!??” Our first performance was in Salt Lake City. The number of encouraging texts I received from friends and family leading up to the concert was incredible…almost unreal. I figured Heavenly Father was prompting people to text me and help me be brave. And it worked. I felt nervous, but courageous. And that feeling continued through the whole tour. Believe it or not, I was actually able to enjoy the performances instead of being swallowed up by nerves. I know that God lifted my fear and allowed me to perform at my best.
I will probably never overcome my fear of diving. But the difference is, it doesn’t matter. Diving isn’t an important part of my life. Singing music that uplifts and blesses, is. And because it is important to me I ask God to help me be brave and He makes me brave.
He’ll do the same for you.
Blog to you soon,